Todd's blog

Why feeling?

Maintaining a positive attitude/outlook and staying focused on what you want are helpful. You can keep yourself up-up-up everyday through sheer force of will, but it takes a lot of discipline. Not to mention, you’ll eventually stumble in your determination.

That said, staying positive does help you deal with the triggering issues that show up in your life. If you can stay positive, it’s worth doing, since it gives you a better outlook on life. It’s kind of a daily fake-it-‘til-you-make-it scenario.

Still, I think it’s more impactful to “feel your feelings” to resolve underlying issues that show up again and again in your life. That way you don’t have to revisit the same issues over and over and continually apply your positive, disciplined mindset.

How do you do this? You “simply” feel the uncomfortable feelings until they stop bothering you. As you repeat this (it’s not a one-and-done deal), you’ll feel your reaction to your triggers weaken in intensity. At some point, you simply won’t care about the issues anymore. They no longer carry an emotional charge for you.

Can it take a while to resolve these uncomfortable feelings? Um, … yes. We’re talking about lifelong, deeply-ingrained, societally-reinforced belief systems and ways of thinking. It may take a few tries … or a lifetime’s worth. So, is it worth it to do this?

It’s helpful to acknowledge that there is a price to pay to change and resolve these issues once and for all. Are you willing to pay the price to change: the consistent, intentional dive into the heart of these uncomfortable feelings?

Realize that whatever you decide, you’re already paying a price, i.e., the price of staying the same. You know the cost of staying the same. It’s your everyday experience that you wish would change for the better. The bad news: it won’t change unless/until you do.

So, would you rather:

  1. Commit some time and effort to dealing with deep, core feelings that cause you discomfort whenever they arise, or
  2. Let these deep-seated, unconscious feelings run your life every day of your life, for the rest of your life?

I encourage you to make a conscious decision about your interest in investing in your evolution. For me, the choice is easy!